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| The Life of Mary Sue the Red Maned Black Coated Alicorn | |
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| Writer(s) | KingofSquirrels |
| Date published | January 12, 2013 |
| Words | 78,664 |
| Status | Unfinished |
| Type/genre | Romance Sad Comedy Slice of Life |
| Featuring | Mane 6 Cutie Mark Crusaders Twist |
| Story link(s) | |
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The Life of Mary Sue the Red Maned Black Coated Alicorn is a story written by KingofSquirrels who wanted to write a direct parody of the Mary Sues of fiction. The story (as the title suggests) follows a Red Maned, Black Coated Alicorn whose name goes as far as being Mary Sue in accordance with her character.
Style[]
The story is written in the third-person, present tense, and switches between the viewpoints of Mary Sue, Gary Stu, Self Insert, or one of the Mane 6 every chapter break. Each chapter also comes with pictures of the involving family and various other things.
It's my Birthday![]
Mary Sue sets off to invite her closest friends to her birthday party. She starts with Rainbow Dash who agrees to come, despite thinking to herself how low Mary must have stooped to believe that their relationship was anything like close friends. Then she goes to Sweet Apple Acres to find Applejack and Big Macintosh. Applejack and Big Mac tell Mary Sue that they have a lot of work to do, but Mary Sue finishes it for them in seconds using magic. Without an excuse, they agree to come as well. Mary Sue then makes her way to Sugarcube Corner, where she confronts Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie seems peeved at first that Mary Sue didn’t ask for help in setting up the party, but Mary reminds her that last time she helped, she became too tired to attend. Pinkie Pie then fires the excuse that she has to help babysit tonight, but Mrs. Cake interjects, stating that she has everything covered. Pinkie Pie then agrees to come to the party as well. Mary Sue then heads over to Twilight's library, arriving just as the purple mare had finished re-shelving. Twilight tells Mary that she can’t come since she has to re-shelve her books a second time, so Mary does the job for her. Twilight then agrees to come to the party. Mary then heads over to Carousel Boutique where she can invite Rarity. Rarity tells Mary that she simply can't, since Mary's own line of dresses have conquered the market and are forcing her to work harder if she wants to compete. Mary tells Rarity that she needs a dress for her birthday party, and is willing to also pay extra for a rush order. Rarity then agrees to come to the party, but asks for the bits upfront. Finally, Mary Sue goes to Fluttershy's cottage where Angel opens the door for her. Upon being asked to come to the party, Fluttershy only agrees upon finding out that all her other friends have agreed to come as well. Mary Sue then happily heads home as waits for her guests. However, nopony arrives. Mary then decides to get drunk on her lonesome and then goes to bed, crying herself asleep.
Somtimes Ignorance is Bliss[]
According to the author, this ending is the canon one. Mary Sue wakes up from one of her recurring dreams where all the other fillies used to make fun of her. After a nice shower and breakfast while listening to the song “Equestria Girls”, Mary decides to go investigate why her friends did not attend her party. She stops by the library first, where she meets Spike. Spike directs Mary to Sugarcube Corner where she finds the mane 6 chatting with each other. Mary Sue decides to eavesdrop on them. The mane 6’s conversation begins to shift the whereabouts of Big Mac after the party, and it is then that they all find out that nopony went. It is then that Rainbow Dash decides to begin a rant all about why she doesn’t like Mary Sue, and the other girls are inclined to agree with her on many points despite being slightly more empathetic. Fluttershy then tells her friends that Mary Has been listening in the whole time. Mary Sue runs away crying, and goes to the park where she decidedly sits on a bench. She is joined by Derpy who exchanges some sympathy with her. The two mares then become friends.
[Non Canon] Comedy[]
Mary Sue wakes up the next morning after the "party" from an erotic dream involving her and Big Macintosh. While Mary Sue is having breakfast, an exact copy of herself burst out of her bowl of alphabet cereal. Said exact copy is Mary Sue’s imaginary friend from magic kindergarten, Plot Device, who tells Mary Sue to call her Plottie. Plottie then cooks up a plan to help Mary Sue make friends. The plan involves kidnapping the mane 6, shrinking them, an placing them in a cage. They start by kidnapping Rainbow Dash with a simple tarp and a fake copy of the latest Daring Do book. Then, Plottie possesses Rarity and has her submit to exotic sex with Twilight (for the second time that day no less), allowing them to kidnap them as well. Mary Sue then whacks Fluttershy unconscious with a single hit from a foam sword (as a reference to The Great Equestrian Foam Sword Fight) kidnapping her as well. Mary Sue also stops by Sugarcube Corner to find Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie however, has already figured out Mary Sue's plans beforehand, but asks to be let into the cage with her friends anyways. Mary Sue then mistakes Applejack’s room for Big Macintosh’s at Sweet Apple Acres, which Applejack takes advantage of, stealing a kiss and some intimate cuddling from the black alicorn. This results in Mary Sue whacking her against the roof, rendering her unconscious. Mary Sue then realizes that she could have just teleported them directly to her house rather than go through so much trouble. After they do get to the black alicorn’s house. Mary Sue tells them that she realized that they probably don’t like her since they don’t know her very well, what with her suddenly appearing without any background story and such. Thus, she forces the mane 6 to watch a "two hundred and ninety five hour movie marathon from [Mary Sue's] birth to [her] high school graduation"
[Non Canon] Derpy's Wedding[]
Princess Luna comes up to Princess Celestia asking about what's going on. Celestia replies that a wedding is underway. The scene then cuts to Derpy Hooves being wed to the King of Squirrels by Mary Sue. A slew of FIMFiction users in attendance at the wedding then leave their remarks.
Growing Up[]
Gary Stu checks his mail to find a letter from his sister. In the letter she tells him about how she made a friends named Derpy. Gary Stu then finishes making breakfast (bacon and eggs), before suddenly finding a peculiar smell in the house. He makes his way to his little sister's room to find that she is going through her first heat. He goes back downstairs before his little sister, Self Insert, does. When she arrives for breakfast, he tells her that they had gotten a letter from Mary Sue, and then "reads" it to her when she fails to decipher Mary Sue's handwriting. He lies however, saying that she has made lots of friends, and that she wants them to visit. Self Insert then falls asleep just after giving him a hug and telling him that "he smells good". Gary quickly deposits her in her room full of Daring Do merchandise, before going downstairs to pack his writing utensils and unfinished Daring Do novel so that he can continue his job (writing the Daring Do series) in Ponyville.
Manehattan Prince[]
Rainbow Dash wakes up Twilight in the middle of the night so that she can escort her to the book store and help her get a copy of the latest Daring Do novel, something she is too shy to do on her own. Many a lesbian joke directed at Rainbow Dash later, the two ponies end up at the little kid's book store where they both get a copy of the book. Later, as they walk home, Twilight tells Rainbow Dash about how she feels bad about what happened with Mary Sue, while Rainbow Dash just mentions how she feel much better now that she has stopped trying to hang out with them. Twilight also mentions how Princess Celestia had told her that she is disappointed in the fact that Twilight would feign friendship, and that she has a lot more to learn.
The scene then cuts to Mary Sue and Derpy having a sleep-over at Mary Sue's house. After a little discussion about Mary's family, the doorbell rings. Mary is surprised to find Gary Stu at her door with Self Insert, or rather Selfie, as her family calls her, asleep in a basket. Gary then explains the situation to Mary, and after a little convincing, he manages to convince her to take Selfie under her care while he goes off to write his book somewhere else in Ponyville. Mary elects to enroll Selfie in school as well. After Gary Stu gives Derpy a signed copy of his book for her daughter, and gives his goodbye’s and an emergency whistle to Selfie, he leaves.
Characters[]
Mary Sue[]
Mary Sue is a red maned black alicorn with an infinity symbol for a cutie mark. She has a brother named Gary Stu and a Sister named Self Insert. Mary Sue saved the world, became one of Princess Celestia’s prized pupils out of two (Twilight Sparkle being the other one), and has unmatched skill in any task. Angel is even very much noticeably polite with her, and Spike would even consider leaving Rarity for her if she only just curled her mane. She also easily seduces Applejack in The Red Maned, Black Coated Alicorn Mary gets Even (albeit involuntarily). She is passionately in love with Big Macintosh. What she can’t seem to do is make the mane 6 like her in the slightest, nor is she able to seduce Big Mac (who seems fully aware and fearful of getting into a relationship with her). She threw many parties for many different occasions, but nopony has ever come to any of them.
Plot Device[]
Plot Device, or Plottie, is Mary Sue's childhood imaginary friend. She looks exactly like Mary Sue, but is more mischievous in nature, choosing to go the hard way about anything even when simple solutions are clear. Despite being simply "Mary Sue's imagination", she can manipulate objects, perform magic, and possess other ponies without any form of effort on Mary Sue's part. Mary Sue herself does not know what Plot Device does when she is left to her own devices and vice versa. Everypony seems completely oblivious to any form of conversation Mary Sue has with Plot Device as well. What Plot Device never does do is make direct contact with any characters besides Mary Sue.
Gary Stu[]
Gary Stu is Mary Sue's alicorn brother. He has dragon wings, which he inherited from his great grandfather who was a dragon. His cutie mark is a bunny face which represents his ability to woo anything and everything of the opposite gender, sub-consciously when it comes to members of the same species. However, the ability seems to not affect a handful of outliers, such as Derpy Hooves. He also has the ability to precisely manipulate fire. He has a deep dislike for phoenixes, particularly after having learned a healing technique from a queen phoenix that failed to bring his dead girlfriend back to life, and possibly gave him immortality. He is also very violent during combat, to the point where it's almost cruel and unusual. He also lies a lot if he thinks he can improve his image. Finally, he seems to excel in everything he does, just like Mary.
Self Insert[]
Self Insert, or Selfie, is an alicorn filly who is just as much over-powered as her brother and sister, Gary Stu and Mary Sue. However, she is uncomfortable without her brother, has fragile feelings, and is overall not confident in anything she does. Also, she has little idea of what she is doing most of the time despite being over-powered. She is a blank flank.