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Fluttershy: Make sure you eat the whole thing or you won't get enough of the drug in your system. You really should eat more than that, Pavlov Bunny. I said eat the carrot. I promise you'll see your friends soon, Just eat the carrot. If you don't eat the carrot I'll have no choice but to throw you in the bunny fire. Oh well. Into the fire you go. Bouncing bunny babies burning brightly..!
Fluttershy: Hey everyone, I made an innocent bonfire, and I was just w
Twilight: Attention royal subjects! Fire is spreading like a mofo!
Crowd: I don't like fire!
Fluttershy: Look how high I can jump!
Twilight: Unfortunately, it's not coming from one of Fluttershy's innocent friendship fires.
Fluttershy: Oh, thank Lord Smooze.
Twilight: It's coming from a DRAGON!!
Applejack: What in the name of Lee's ghost is a non-baby dragon doing outside of its cage?
Twilight: Something evil, I'm sure. Princess Celestia sent me a letter saying that I need to lead a special task force to destroy him.
Pinkie Pie: An extermination mission? The Princess doesn't even trust you with a waffle iron!
Rarity: Hey! Why does Celestia only talk to Twilight? Can we see this letter of yours?
Twilight: The letter is written in a special ink that only I can read. And making waffles in the bounce house would have worked if Spike didn't have such a weak grip.
Rarity: He DOES have a weak grip.
Twilight: We might not all make it back, so I need everypony to get her affairs in order. Now everyone montage!
Raindbow Dash: Dash!!
Applejack: Gravy!!
Rarity: Tacky.. Giant hat, activate!!
Twilight: Alright girls, attenSHUN! Princess Celestia put me in charge, so from now on you must refer to me as Princess Sparkle. And you all have to salute me like this.
Applejack: I've been in a war before
Raindbow Dash: I haven't! They said I was too awesome and nearsighted to join.
Rarity: Good thing I brought my invisibility scarf!
Pinkie Pie: Ooh, witchcraft!
Raindbow Dash: That's like the opposite of a rainbow!
Fluttershy: Um, excuse me, Twilight?
Twilight: Uh huh? Lookin' at top secret documents.
Fluttershy: I know you're planning this, but-
Twilight: Ah ha! This triangle looks dangerous.
Fluttershy: If, say, Pinkie Pie was suddenly injured, maybe I could stay behind and watch her?
Twilight: Ok.
Fluttershy: Oh! Good. I'll find my baseball bat
Twilight: Wait! We need you with us! You've killed HORDES of dragons before!
Fluttershy: Only a dozen
Twilight: And Spike can stay behind and do our chores. He can't come with us anyway, his legs are still healing!
Soike: Workin' through the pain!
Raindbow Dash: Hey Twilight, the girls wanna see that letter Celestia sent you. They think that you just made it up, but I believe you, Commander.
Twilight: How honest of you to let me know but then, that's why you're the element of [LOYALTY].
Raindbow Dash: Woah, what is THAT?
Twilight: That is a tree. Unfortunately, we're here to climb the mountain.
Fluttershy: But it's so… tall!
Raindbow Dash: Well it IS a tall thing. I'm gonna dash up there and look at stuff!
Applejack: Hold your mower! I'm the element of [HONESTY], and I think the loyal thing to do is stick together.
Raindbow Dash: SO unrainbow.
Rarity: And after I cut out his heart I can wear his shimmering scales as a display of my power! This'll be MUCH less hassle than stealing Spike's!
Pinkie Pie: Please don't take scales, Rarity! I'm just a baby dragon!
Twilight: Girls! Let's wait to laugh in Spike's face! Fluttershy, let's try to stay on task. What color tiara do you think I'll look best in? Fluttershy?
Raindbow Dash: Hey! That's not a dragon! Dragons go up!
Fluttershy: It- it's so. So. steep!
Raindbow Dash: Well it IS a steep thing!
Fluttershy: I accidentally glued my wings together.
Raindbow Dash: Dash
Twilight: Ugh, we'll just have to cut them off.
Applejack: I've got the map!
Twilight: That's confidential!
Fluttershy: I thought an Elmer's bath would be good for my pores.
Raindbow Dash: Ugh, Applejack, go help her. You're honestly the loyalest of all ponies.
Applejack: That's why I'm the element of [HONESTY]! Don't worry, we'll be there quicker than a rattlesnake in July!
Pinkie Pie: Twenty Two! Another empty day!
Rarity: Ugh, and still no word from them.
Applejack: Twilight's map was not a map.
Raindbow Dash: You gonna let her say that about your map, Commander? Rain BOW!!
Twilight: Wee!
Rarity: Wee!
Twilight: Last place again!
Fluttershy: But, it's not ground
Twilight: Pinkie, sing one of your songs from the orphanage to help Fluttershy calm her fears.
Fluttershy: Not a song
Pinkie Pie: Step one, try not to be so self conscious. Two shift your weight into your haunches Three give a leap into the air and Four just forget your parents are both dead!
Twilight: I meant the OTHER song!
Pinkie Pie: Chin up, even if you're not adopted It's not because you are unwanted But, it might help if you were magic. Not just a boring ugly pink earth pony who nopony will ever love because you're unworthy!
Fluttershy: Okay, here I go. Step one
Applejack: Gravy!
Twilight: Princess!
Rarity: Fabulous!
Fluttershy: Step two
Twilight: Just don't fall or you'll die!
Pinkie Pie: Yipee, it's my birthday!
Rarity: Ugh, next time we're leaving her down there.
Applejack: I'm So loyal!
Twilight: Let's keep it down. According to my map, we're entering an ABBAlanche zone. The quietest scream would force us to return home.
Fluttershy: We wouldn't face the dragon?
Twilight: Right.
Fluttershy: (screams)
Together: ABBALANCHE!!!
Raindbow Dash: Rainbow! Dash! Rainbow Dodge!!
Twilight: Oh no! S.O.S.!
Applejack: Mamma mia!
Rarity: Voulez vous!
Pinkie Pie: Woohoo! I finally saw ABBA!
Rarity: Well, I suppose this is why I brought my hat scarf. Oh, please tell me I brought the hat that goes with this.
Raindbow Dash: I think we've got bigger problems than making sure our hats match our hats.
Fluttershy: Um, woops?
Applejack: Oh, that's okay walkin' disaster.
Twilight: Yeah! We'll just have Spike move Oh That's right.
Raindbow Dash: Hey Twilight do you think spiders can dream?
Twilight: Oh look, it's the cave! Alright girls, get into position. Good job, girls! Rainbow Dash. Fly into the smoke and look for clues.
Raindbow Dash: Rainbow!
Twilight: Applejack! Spruce up that tree with some of your funky modern art. Rarity and Pinkie Pie. Keep thinking of mean things to say to Spike when we return. And Fluttershy, snap out of your catatonic state. It's time to put your dragonslaying abilities to good use. You can look for buried treasure later!
Fluttershy: I- I- have demons I can't face.
Raindbow Dash: But wait! You fight demons all the time.
Fluttershy: These are inner demons. The dragon is my-
Applejack: What's that, lawn mower?
Fluttershy: The dragon's my
Twilight: Bleh?
Fluttershy: The dragon's my father!
Twilight: But Fluttershy, how can he be your father if you're not even a dragon?
Fluttershy: Dragon-ness is recessive.
Raindbow Dash: You're such a baby. I have a great relationship with both of my parents because they love me.
Fluttershy: Well, that just makes me feel worse.
Pinkie Pie: Look at the bright side! At least you HAVE a father!
Fluttershy: Yes, but it's my father who left me to fend for myself in the frozen tundra with nothing but a hatchet and a length of rope. I would have died if a pack of wolves hadn't taken me in as one of their own. But I wasn't safe! The wolves were robots built by my father to lull me into a false sense of security. I awoke one morning to find that he had slaughtered them all and left a message in the snow reading, "I dare you to love again." But the message was actually written in ant pheromone. I was suddenly engulfed by thousands of rabid African ants, each trying to burrow its way inside me to get to the queen larvae my father had put in my Cheerios.
Raindbow Dash: Get to the rainbows!
Twilight: But if he's your estranged father, why didn't you tell us that before we came all the way up here?
Fluttershy: I was ashamed to.
Raindbow Dash: Dash
Applejack: Hey, all of us have some depth to our characters.
Raindbow Dash: I don't!
Applejack: Almost all of us have some depth to our characters. But you can't let a convoluted backstory stop you from helping your friends! With just a little teamwork, we can all-
Twilight: I'm going in alone! Once I prove that I'm a bad girl to Celestia, she'll turn me into a princess for sure! Princess Sparkle! I might have to frame Molestia again so she doesn't jeopardize my position. Can't be too hard. Oh, that's right! My mission! Hello, loyal subject. My name is Princess Twilight Acorna Sparkle. Although you may know me by my Gaia name, Celestia 2. I'm part of team DESU. the Dragon Evacuation Something Unit. You must return to your cage at once! The local children don't have anything to throw peanuts at anymore and Spike is simply too small of a target!
Raindbow Dash: That was like, 52% UNcooler.
Applejack: Guacamole!
Rarity: It's a good thing I brought my magical Fluttershy contact lenses. To think, you all laughed at my acting classes. Daddy, I'm home!
Dragon: Fluttershy..?
Rarity: I just wanted to say that I forgive you for all those nasty things that you did to me. You were just trying to teach me the importance of perseverance.
Dragon: World's best dad
Rarity: Sure, I've been damaged psychologically, but that's all in the past! Let's move on! Although, obviously you still have to pay child support for all those years you were gone. I should just crush this stupid contact lens. Pinkie, you're a present?
Pinkie Pie: Exactly! I'll bet he misses having a daughter so much, he'd be willing to adopt me! Surprise! I'm your new daughter! You could never abuse me enough for ME to hate you! Only Pegasus or Unicorn he says. As always.
Raindbow Dash: Alright, that's it! We've tried purple, we've tried white, and we've tried pink! It's time to taste the painbow! I'm dashing in! Rainbow Kick!!
Fluttershy: Not this time! I'm strong now! Listen here, old man! Just because you destroyed all my stuffed animal friends doesn't mean you can destroy my flesh animal friends! I'm here to make amends for all the softball games you never came to see and all the drawings that would never be good enough for your fridge. And when I say make amends, I, mean, DIE! Any last words?
Dragon: But I was just testing your love, and you passed with flying colors.
Fluttershy: Do you know what a bunny fire is?
Dragon: Is it like a fire? For bunnies? Are you still angry because I threw your Velveteen rabbit in that fire? 'Cause that was also part of the test.
Twilight: And there was so much dragon blood, we just slid down the mountain, like a water slide!
Spike: Try not to say the d-word, Twilight. Otherwise the bunnies start to salivate.
Twilight: Dragon, dragon, dragon, dragon. Dragon! Take a letter. Dear Princess Celestia, Today I learned an incredibly useful-
Applejack: Hey Twilight! Check this out! The ball just keeps bouncing higher and higher! At this rate, I'll make it onto the Wonderballs for sure! As the element of [LOYALTY] I can honestly say that this ball is awesome!
Twilight: That ball is crazy! Dear Princess Celestia, Today I learned that you have GOT to check this ball out! It just keeps bouncing and it won't stop. Anyway, I think that's about it. Your faithful student, Princess Sparkle.