Talk:Dreamy Rainbow/@comment-4531340-20120612082008

To elaborate on that copyediting template I put there, instead of second person (you this, you that, etc), it should be third person. Some examples:

The last sentence of the second section: "You can only play this game once, unless you delete a file it places onto your computer after you play the game." It would be more encyclopedic to have it as "This game can only be played once, unless a file it places onto the player's computer is deleted upon completion of the game." That's just one example; this article is full of second person (though it doesn't look like it'll be too much work to fix). I mean, to a certain extent it's okay, but those sections really are written like a walkthrough.