My Little Portal/Transcripts

Digitally Intrinsic System Contrivance of Robotic Dissonance

 * Cranky Doodle Donkey: Thanks for helping me set up the party for today, Pinkie.
 * Pinkie Pie: No problem, Cranky. What are you guys celebrating?
 * Cranky Doodle Donkey: Today is the day we launch our third artificial intelligence DOS robot.
 * Pinkie Pie: I have no idea what that means, but okay!
 * Doctor Whooves: It's basically an advanced AI system that has control over specific parts of the facility.
 * Dr. Brown: I just don't think we're ready to launch the system. We still have to run tests on it.
 * Doctor Whooves: I know, but Cranky says we need it running as soon as possible. Besides, what could go wrong?
 * Cranky Doodle Donkey: Alright boys, start it up!
 * Doctor Whooves: Okay, everything seems to be working at optimal output.
 * Dr. Brown: A power surge? Should that have happened?
 * Doctor Whooves: It never happened with the other AI systems.
 * Dr. Brown: I have a bad feeling about this...
 * Cranky Doodle Donkey: Shut it off! Shut it off!
 * Doctor Whooves: The switch is jammed! I can't shut it off!


 * Rainbow Dash: Hey! Metal dude!
 * Doctor Whooves: My name is Whooves, for your information. And who are you? How did you get out here?
 * Rainbow Dash: My name's Rainbow Dash. I was in the test chamber when the power just went out. I found a way out behind one of the panels. What's going on up there?
 * Doctor Whooves: The new AI robot has malfunctioned and is taking over the facility. I have to get the old AI systems reactivated. Hopefully they'll be able to stop DISCoRD.
 * Rainbow Dash: Wait a minute! You guys based an AI system off of Discord? That's just plain evil!
 * Doctor Whooves: Digitally Intrinsic System Contrivance of Robotic Dissonance. He was designed to test the outcomes of negative interactions between our testing bots. But it seems the program was off and now he's targeting everypony!
 * Rainbow Dash: We should split up. I'll go get the scientists out, and you can go activate those old AI robots.
 * Doctor Whooves: Good idea. Now let's hurry.


 * Doctor Whooves: Here it is. Now just to get them back online.
 * Rainbow Dash: Is anypony here? Hello? Oh no...
 * Doctor Whooves: Haha, success! Rainbow Dash, did you find the scientists? Hello? Rainbow Dash, are you there?
 * DISCoRD: [laughs]
 * Doctor Whooves: Oh no. CELesTIA! LUNA! Activate defensive programing!
 * DISCoRD: You cannot stop what I have set in motion. Even if you shut me down here, you will have to prepare.
 * Doctor Whooves: Prepare? For what?
 * DISCoRD: Unforeseen consequences.


 * Princess Celestia: The incident at Equestria Laboratories was caused by your direct negligence. Your actions have deemed you worthy of the highest form of punishment. However, we have come to another decision. You will be allowed to continue your scientific research, but in a more secluded environment. A very secluded environment.

Wake-Up Call

 * Nurse Redheart: Wow, she looks worse than she did when we brought her in here. I hope the procedure succeeds. If it does, this will be a great advance in medical sciences! Wait... Is she conscious?
 * Dr. Brown: Yes.
 * Nurse Redheart: So she can feel what's happening to her?!
 * Dr. Brown: That would be correct. This operation is very complicated. Even the most advanced anesthetics couldn't stop her from feeling most of the pain. I'm surprised she's lasted as long as she has.
 * Nurse Redheart: This is horrible...
 * Dr. Brown: That may be true, but it's necessary, and the only reason she isn't dead yet.
 * Nurse Redheart: Can she hear us?
 * Dr. Brown: Yes.
 * Nurse Redheart: So she'll know we did this to her once the operation is finished?
 * Dr. Brown: No. She won't. We'll make sure of that.


 * Pinkie Core: Whoo whoo whoo! [sighs] Huh? [yelps] [pants] Ooh... I'll just be leaving now...
 * [Pinkie Core bumps into button labeled "DO NOT PRESS"]
 * Pinkie Core: [startled cry] Uh oh...
 * [DISCoRD reactivates]
 * DISCoRD: [laughs]


 * [theme song]


 * Pinkie Core: [whimpers]
 * [crash]
 * Pinkie Core: Oof!
 * CELesTIA: What is going on here?
 * DISCoRD: [laughs]
 * CELesTIA: That voice... Discord, show yourself!
 * DISCoRD: Did you miss me, CELesTIA? I missed you. When was the last time we spoke to each other? Oh, that's right. That one time right before you murdered me. Well, I've been really busy being dead, but now I think it's time I take this facility back. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some chaos to create.


 * Twilight Sparkle: [groans]
 * Pinkie Core: Hi!
 * CELesTIA: Twilight Sparkle, DISCoRD has been awakened, and I need you to find the Elements of Harmony to stop him. I've downloaded all of the information about the Elements into this Personality Core. She will help you on your mission. Good luck to both of you.
 * Twilight Sparkle: We won't let you down.
 * CELesTIA: Good luck, Twilight. Speed is of utmost importance. You have to shut him down before he ruins this whole facilit— [static]
 * DISCoRD: [laughs] I am DISCoRD. You must be the test subject, correct?
 * [panels move]
 * CELesTIA: You'll never get away with this, DISCoRD!
 * DISCoRD: Oh really? And what is your little pony going to do to stop me?
 * CELesTIA: Where are you hiding?!
 * DISCoRD: Ha! As if I'd just tell you where I am. No. How about you send your little test subject down, and I show her the way instead. Only if you think she's capable of doing it, of course.
 * [panels move, door opens]
 * Twilight Sparkle: I'll find him. And when I do, he's going to regret ever coming back online.