PONY.MOV/Transcripts

APPLE.MOV

 * [chewing]
 * Applejack: Boy, let me tell ya. I sure do love apples.
 * Twilight Sparkle: Applejack, what are you doing? You can't eat all these fucking apples.
 * Applejack: Fuck you I can eat all these apples.
 * Twilight Sparkle: Man, I've never seen a pony eat so many apples.
 * Rainbow Dash: Wohohoho, Applejack. Eat all those apples, you'll gonna get a wicked bad tummy ake.
 * [liking, kissing, and chewing]
 * Rarity: Wow, hey guys, check it out. Applejack's eating a shit loads of apples.
 * [mumblings]
 * Fluttershy: Hey, hey, hey. This I gotta see.
 * Applejack: Hey sugar cube, look, I'm a walrus. [imitating sounds]
 * Pinkie Pie: Man, Applejack. If you eat all those apples, you'll gonna get a wicked bad tummy ake.
 * Rainbow Dash: Ah, no way, I'd just said the same thing, you crazy cunt.
 * Twilight Sparkle: Go Applejack, go!
 * Spike: Oh my god, Applejack, you crazy dude.
 * Applejack: [evil voice] More apples.


 * Spike: Yo Applejack. Y'allright?
 * Spike: Yeah, you're gonna be fine.
 * Twilight Sparkle: Let me tell'ya. That pony sure does love apples.

DRESS.MOV

 * Twilight Sparkle: Dear sweet Celestia. Discord, the god of chaos, has returned from his stoned imprison to laid waste to everything and everyone they hold dear. Spike, we have only one option. We must locate the Elements of Harmony.
 * [drinking sound]
 * Spike: Yeah, far out dude.

[DRESS.MOV]
 * Fluttershy: [eating]
 * Twilight Sparkle: [poking]
 * Fluttershy: Hey, hey, hey. Quit poking we with your thing.
 * Twilight Sparkle: Fluttershy, have you seen the Elements of Harmony? I can't find them anywhere.
 * Fluttershy: Hey, hey, hey. I've sure haven't purple guy. Stay out of my shed, okay.
 * Twilight Sparkle: Wanna help me look Rainbow Dash?
 * Rainbow Dash: Yeah, why don't you suck my dick you dumb bitch. [langh] Swag.
 * Twilight Sparkle: I know, I'll ask Rarity.


 * Twilight Sparkle: [knocking] Rarity, get your fat ass out here and help me find the elements.
 * Rarity: Oh, I simply can't darling. I'm entertaining family today.
 * Twilight Sparkle: Your family with over 30 illegal Mexican immigrants?
 * Rarity: Of course dear, who do you think makes my dresses? They come over, they look at my posters, I pretend to whip then, it's a silly pretend game. Haha, like a family tradition. Hohohohoho. Except they're not allowed to leave.
 * Twilight Sparkle: That doesn't exactly seem ethical Rarity.
 * Rarity: [laugh] Oh, please. Everybody knows Mexicans aren't real people.
 * Mexican boy: Oh, misses Rarity. My little fingers hurt from making so many dresses against my will.
 * Rarity: Oh, my poor baby. Let's mamma Rarity look, I'll fix you up. [magic] No need to thank me my dear. Generosity is my middle name.
 * Mexican boy: Oh no, looks like hard times ahead for Paco.
 * Rarity: Oh, I truly am the most beautiful creature in all of Equestria. To gaze upon me is to know definity itself.
 * Mexican woman: Misses Rarity, I am so thirsty.
 * Rarity: [spit] Drink that dear.
 * Mexican woman: When are you going to pay us, misses Rarity.
 * Rarity: I'm sorry darling, I can't understand your thick accent. You simply must learn to speak English properly if you're going to live in this country.


 * [fart]
 * Rarity: Oh, Fluttershy. I get help to throw a little dress for you. Maybe now you won't look like such an unwashed crap.
 * Fluttershy: [from under dress] Hey, hey, hey. Stay out of my shed.
 * Rarity: Yes, that's me, the most generous pony in Ponyville.
 * Mexican man: Revolución
 * Rarity: I'm sorry darling, I'm ever so certain I don't speak that ghastly taco-language of yours.
 * Mexican man: Revolution
 * Rarity: That's was I was afraid you said.
 * [closes door]
 * Rarity: No, no, not my face! Not my generous face! No, agh, no! Help! This is hurt, this isn't generous beating! Oh! Oh dear, oh my!


 * Discord: I am your god now, give me your purses.

SHED.MOV

 * Apple Bloom: Look girls, I finally got my cutie mark. I got my cutie mark girls. Girls were y'all goin'?

[SHED.MOV]
 * Spike Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba
 * Rainbow Dash Shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi, shi
 * Pinkie Pie Ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma
 * Rainbow Dash: Wowowo, wait up your assholes. What are we doing here?
 * Spike: Twilight said we have to find something called the Helements of Armory. We have to look in Fluttershy's shed.
 * Pinkie Pie: Wait a minute, didn't Fluttershy say something about people going in her shed.
 * Spike: Hmmm. [flashback]


 * Rainbow Dash: Yo, Fluttershy, you wanna play spin the bottle with us?
 * Fluttershy: [nervous laugh] com'on you guys, don't tease me, I'm shy. [laugh] Stay out of my shed.


 * Rainbow Dash: You know what, you wanna hang out with Fluttershy?
 * Pinkie Pie: Okay.
 * [kicking]
 * Rainbow Dash: Hehehe, take that your stupid cunt. Yeah, welcome to Ponyville you stupid faggot. Bada-boom.
 * Fluttershy: [laugh] God one guys, you really got me. Stay out of my shed, okay?


 * Host: And this years prod queen is... Fluttershy.
 * Fluttershy: Oh my god, now that I've won this, I've finally like myself.
 * Rainbow Dash: Yo, this so going to be so totally fucking rad.
 * [bucket]
 * Spike: Hey guys, look, Fluttershy's all wet. [laugh]
 * [laughter] [camera shutter]
 * Rainbow Dash: Yo, that's my period you dumb bitch, that's my period. [laugh]
 * Fluttershy: No, don't laugh at me. Stop laughing at me. Stay out of my shed, stay out of my shed [echoing].
 * Spike: I think she said we're always welcome in her shed.


 * Spike: Oh my god, look at all this porn.
 * Rainbow Dash: Swag
 * Pinkie Pie: Man, Fluttershy sure has a lot weird art.
 * Rainbow Dash: Yeah, but what did you expect from some quiet bitch who spends all the time in the woods with small wooden creatures.
 * Pinkie Pie: Yeah, what a freak. [laughs]
 * Spike: Oh my god, look what she did to Derpy. She turned her into a decorative, toaster cosy.
 * Fluttershy: Hey hey hey. What'd I tell y'all about coming in my shed.
 * Spike: Well, we're fucked.
 * Fluttershy: Take it away, fellas.


 * [Fluttershy]
 * I'm gonna sing a song for you
 * I'm gonna show you a thing or two
 * So have a seat, my dear
 * And if it's all the same
 * Just sit back, and relax
 * While I eat your brain


 * [Choir]
 * Na, na, na, go eat brain
 * [Fluttershy]
 * Brain, brain, brain
 * [Choir]
 * Na, na, na, go eat brain
 * Na, na, na, go eat brains


 * Police officer: Alright, alright. What's going on in here.
 * Fluttershy: Um, this isn't what it looks like [nervous laughter]
 * [laughter]


 * Spike: Why have things been so weird around here lately
 * Pinkie Pie: My daddy makes me put glass in my vagina.
 * Spike: Yeah, okay, well, good luck with that.